Running Fears and Such

As much as yesterday felt like a disaster, today was a triumph of sorts. I took it extremely slow. It was like in movies where someone is driving in a pos car and other cars pass them followed by motorcycles, bicycles, runners, walkers, and soon an old person with a walker. One thing I noticed was that my lung capacity has gotten better because I was conversational about 80% of my run. Towards the end I got a bit faster, but both of my feet fell asleep...again and it felt like they had been dipped in cement. Another cool thing I noticed was how cognizant I have become with my running. For instance, I have to remember not to look down, straighten my left foot (with tends to pronate inwards), and keep my knees up. This becomes a job in and of itself and it's nice when you run with a partner or small group that you notice what they do as well. I know that Leah tends to look down a lot too so every few minutes I yelled "LOOK UP!" to her while she made some sort of goofy noise that I am unable to demonstrate with mere letters and symbols.

I read another article in Runner's World called "Attack of the Nagging Fears" and they listed a lot of common fears that runners have such as falling behind, not meeting speed work goals, not finishing, falling off the treadmill (hahaha), and getting injured. I looked at them and figured out what a few of mine are and how to fix them. The first one is falling behind. Well, I think this is something that I need to get over because I am a beginner and the goal is to finish. I know that pride is a big issue for me in most of my daily life and this is no exception. I don't want to look like a loser or be embarrassed by my slowness. I am starting to feel slightly less fearful of this because I am running for me and not the hypothetical guy in the Tapout t-shirt yelling at me to speed up.

Another recent fear of mine has been gaining weight. Those who know me know that this is a struggle for me and will continue to be one. I am not one of those lucky few who are blessed with a figure that never quits nor wavers. I have to work hard to lose every pound and every inch. Lately my eating hasn't been too hot because I use the excuse of "I ran so I can have that". Yeah....no. According to the article, you don't need extra carbohydrates if you exercise an hour or less. There is no need for added consumption, and this week my goals are to eat for my chosen sport. I will run faster, less pressure will be on my lower body, and my muscles will show up better if I weigh less. Wow, I never thought that would be my motivation, but I'm glad it is.